![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png){kind=small}
"Dirty little secret."
Sep. 11th, 2012 01:26 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
justbeingaqueenWho: Santana Lopez and Kurt Hummel
What: Survival Celebration and Sordid Secrets
Where: Kurt & Santana's apartment, New York
When: Just after the end of summer
It turned out that Kurt's Hot Dog of Doom was more like Hot Dog of the Gastrointestinal Apocalypse. He had been so sick, with his body completely betraying him from all angles, that Santana ended up dragging him to the nearest ER where he had to spend a few hours on IV fluids for dehydration and they pumped him full of anti-puke medication and Imodium. It was only after that did Kurt manage to finally get some rest. Before, he kept being woken up by his stomach that it made it near impossible to rest. Santana dragged him back home in a cab, he crawled into his bed wishing like hell Blaine could be there to snuggle him, and crashed out in a deep sleep. And he pretty much slept for almost three days straight, save for getting up to go to the bathroom and getting bottles of Gatorade into him when he still had no interest in touching food ever again. Santana had just left him to it, staying close to make sure he didn't die in his sleep.
He had no finally re-surfaced, flopping out of bed and shuffling into the kitchen of the little apartment he shared with Santana. His pyjama pants had slipped down over his hips to reveal the top of his butt cheek and when he found Santana in there making coffee, he yawned, rubbing over his face sleepily with one hand whilst hitching his pants back up with the other. He was less than fabulous-looking right now, hair all in a disarray and crease marks from his pillow up the side of his face. He had paused only long enough at the bathroom to pee and quickly brush his teeth, but he was sure he had still be half asleep for that. On the upside, despite feeling weak in the wake of the food poisoning, the nausea seemed to have abated and in its place was just a sore stomach from the strain of throwing up.
He dropped down into one of the chairs at the kitchen table. "I didn't die," he announced, voice husky from sleep. "And apparently Puck nearly had to handcuff Blaine to a bed in Lima so he wouldn't get on a plane here right before school's about to start. I woke up to 73 text messages from Blaine. I think his next step might have been carrier pigeon."
What: Survival Celebration and Sordid Secrets
Where: Kurt & Santana's apartment, New York
When: Just after the end of summer
It turned out that Kurt's Hot Dog of Doom was more like Hot Dog of the Gastrointestinal Apocalypse. He had been so sick, with his body completely betraying him from all angles, that Santana ended up dragging him to the nearest ER where he had to spend a few hours on IV fluids for dehydration and they pumped him full of anti-puke medication and Imodium. It was only after that did Kurt manage to finally get some rest. Before, he kept being woken up by his stomach that it made it near impossible to rest. Santana dragged him back home in a cab, he crawled into his bed wishing like hell Blaine could be there to snuggle him, and crashed out in a deep sleep. And he pretty much slept for almost three days straight, save for getting up to go to the bathroom and getting bottles of Gatorade into him when he still had no interest in touching food ever again. Santana had just left him to it, staying close to make sure he didn't die in his sleep.
He had no finally re-surfaced, flopping out of bed and shuffling into the kitchen of the little apartment he shared with Santana. His pyjama pants had slipped down over his hips to reveal the top of his butt cheek and when he found Santana in there making coffee, he yawned, rubbing over his face sleepily with one hand whilst hitching his pants back up with the other. He was less than fabulous-looking right now, hair all in a disarray and crease marks from his pillow up the side of his face. He had paused only long enough at the bathroom to pee and quickly brush his teeth, but he was sure he had still be half asleep for that. On the upside, despite feeling weak in the wake of the food poisoning, the nausea seemed to have abated and in its place was just a sore stomach from the strain of throwing up.
He dropped down into one of the chairs at the kitchen table. "I didn't die," he announced, voice husky from sleep. "And apparently Puck nearly had to handcuff Blaine to a bed in Lima so he wouldn't get on a plane here right before school's about to start. I woke up to 73 text messages from Blaine. I think his next step might have been carrier pigeon."
"I kissed a girl... and I liked it."
Sep. 11th, 2012 12:27 amusedtohaveabsWho: Just Quinn Fabray
What: Private Blog
Where: Yale University, New Haven
When: Start of fall semester
So, I made it to Yale, but honestly, it all still feels like some sort of alternate reality or dream. New Haven is so different to Ohio and there's no doubt about it that Yale feels like it's full of people way, way out of my league. I spent so many years trying to be on a pedestal in Ohio and perched up on top of the top rung of the popularity ladder that it feels really odd being here where I'm just another face in a crowd. No one knows who Quinn Fabray is. No one knows her past and all her stupid mistakes. But most importantly, no one cares, either. No one is immediately judging or pointing fingers at the chick who stupidly got knocked up at sixteen when her biggest worry should have been balancing at the top of the cheer pyramid of the squad she headed.
Some days, I can't believe just how much I fucked my life up. Not that it didn't turn out for the better, and here I am... Yale student. But all those mistakes, you think I would have learnt a lot sooner than I did. I floundered so much, and what I never told anyone - not even Puck, who was probably entitled to know - was that I was diagnosed with post-natal depression after Beth and spent my junior and senior years on antidepressant medication. The times I was a complete bitch, I tried to go without the medication, thinking I was better than it. I wasn't. I was sick and I needed it. I could have spared a hell of a lot of people a lot of heartache if I just listened to people who tried to help me once in awhile.
But all that is old water under the bridge. It's baggage I'll always have, but that doesn't mean I have to carry it around with me wherever I go. I can grow up, I can move on, and I can leave the baggage in a safe spot in the past which is where it belongs. Giving my baby up for adoption was ultimately the best choice I ever made in my life. She's happy, she's healthy, and she's safe. Things there was no one I could ever guarantee her when I didn't even know how to be happy myself. And now life has yet again thrown me another curve ball, but this time, I have no idea how I'm supposed to tackle it. I'm sitting here at Yale trying to find my feet and my head and my heart are in an entirely different state.
The thing is, it's not the state that it should be and home isn't where the heart is. The heart is in a place I never thought it would be, and I'm confused. What does all this mean, and why didn't I see it sooner? Is it just because I'm lonely and everything has changed around me? Not even Google can help me with this one. Maybe we made the right choice. Maybe we really should just pretend nothing ever happened and leave it back in Ohio. It was the right choice for everyone, and there was so much alcohol involved. Alcohol is my biggest enemy. It not only stole my virginity, but now has it stolen my sexuality too?
What: Private Blog
Where: Yale University, New Haven
When: Start of fall semester
So, I made it to Yale, but honestly, it all still feels like some sort of alternate reality or dream. New Haven is so different to Ohio and there's no doubt about it that Yale feels like it's full of people way, way out of my league. I spent so many years trying to be on a pedestal in Ohio and perched up on top of the top rung of the popularity ladder that it feels really odd being here where I'm just another face in a crowd. No one knows who Quinn Fabray is. No one knows her past and all her stupid mistakes. But most importantly, no one cares, either. No one is immediately judging or pointing fingers at the chick who stupidly got knocked up at sixteen when her biggest worry should have been balancing at the top of the cheer pyramid of the squad she headed.
Some days, I can't believe just how much I fucked my life up. Not that it didn't turn out for the better, and here I am... Yale student. But all those mistakes, you think I would have learnt a lot sooner than I did. I floundered so much, and what I never told anyone - not even Puck, who was probably entitled to know - was that I was diagnosed with post-natal depression after Beth and spent my junior and senior years on antidepressant medication. The times I was a complete bitch, I tried to go without the medication, thinking I was better than it. I wasn't. I was sick and I needed it. I could have spared a hell of a lot of people a lot of heartache if I just listened to people who tried to help me once in awhile.
But all that is old water under the bridge. It's baggage I'll always have, but that doesn't mean I have to carry it around with me wherever I go. I can grow up, I can move on, and I can leave the baggage in a safe spot in the past which is where it belongs. Giving my baby up for adoption was ultimately the best choice I ever made in my life. She's happy, she's healthy, and she's safe. Things there was no one I could ever guarantee her when I didn't even know how to be happy myself. And now life has yet again thrown me another curve ball, but this time, I have no idea how I'm supposed to tackle it. I'm sitting here at Yale trying to find my feet and my head and my heart are in an entirely different state.
The thing is, it's not the state that it should be and home isn't where the heart is. The heart is in a place I never thought it would be, and I'm confused. What does all this mean, and why didn't I see it sooner? Is it just because I'm lonely and everything has changed around me? Not even Google can help me with this one. Maybe we made the right choice. Maybe we really should just pretend nothing ever happened and leave it back in Ohio. It was the right choice for everyone, and there was so much alcohol involved. Alcohol is my biggest enemy. It not only stole my virginity, but now has it stolen my sexuality too?
[FACEBOOK]
Jul. 4th, 2012 02:45 am![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
rockstarwarbler.livejournal.comJust Skyped with Kurt. He fell asleep halfway though...
![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
have2justbeme, if you're reading this, can you turn his laptop off and just put a warm blanket around him or something? Maybe shove his pillow further up under his head so he doesn't get a sore neck? It looks awkward. I promise, I'll owe you a huge favour after this.
have2justbeme, if you're reading this, can you turn his laptop off and just put a warm blanket around him or something? Maybe shove his pillow further up under his head so he doesn't get a sore neck? It looks awkward. I promise, I'll owe you a huge favour after this.[FACEBOOK]
Jul. 2nd, 2012 08:43 pmrockstarwarbler.livejournal.comALL BY MYSEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEELF!
DON'T WANT TO BE, ALL BYYYYYYYYYY MYSELF ANYMORE!
ALL BY MYSEEEEEEEEEELF!
DON'T WANT TO LIVE, ALL BY MYSELF ANYMOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORE!!!
DON'T WANT TO BE, ALL BYYYYYYYYYY MYSELF ANYMORE!
ALL BY MYSEEEEEEEEEELF!
DON'T WANT TO LIVE, ALL BY MYSELF ANYMOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORE!!!
rockstarwarbler.livejournal.comWho: rockstarwarbler and tommyboyk
What: A face from the past
Where: Lima Bean, Lima
When: Monday morning after THIS
Blaine didn't know why he was torturing himself like this. It was his first trip to the Lima Bean since Kurt left for New York nearly a week ago, and it was the first time he had been here alone in a long, long time. He and Kurt always came together, and they had been coming here on dates together even before they were dating. They sat down, had coffee together, and just generally did boyfriendly things. Blaine had come thinking it might make him feel closer to Kurt and shed some of that ache he had in missing Kurt so fucking much, but it seemed to only be making him miss him more.
He sat at their favourite little table for two by the window alone, with his one lonely medium drip was sitting in front of him and not grande non-fat mocha cup to keep it company. just across the way, he could see the little old couple who had been here on so many their own dates many a time Kurt and Blaine had, they had practically double-dated all this time, even if they didn't even know each other. When Blaine teared up out of the blue and drew in a quick breath to try and keep his composure, hastily wiping at his eyes before he got himself into too much of a mess, he glanced over and saw the couple looking at him sadly, obviously assuming he and Kurt had broken up. Blaine forced a smile at them, but then picked up his coffee to busy himself with that and try to save face.
Shit, he missed Kurt. He missed him more than he could have anticipated. It was like a constantly aching hole inside, even if they did Skype every day. It just wasn't the same and it was only the start. Last night, though, Kurt had texted Blaine late afternoon while Blaine was still at work and told him he was pretty sure he just experienced his first questionable New York hot dog, and that he had an upset stomach, so he was going to lie down. Then he added a second message telling Blaine to meet him on Skype at the usual time, but if he wasn't there, he was probably sleeping because he was really tired. Kurt never made it and Blaine sat on Skype for an hour waiting for him, but couldn't begrudge Kurt the sleep he obviously needed.
He didn't want to be a clingy boyfriend, but it was early days and he was finding it tough. Tears blurred his vision again when he took his phone from his pocket and flicked Kurt a quick text that simply said 'I miss you. I love you ♥' How the hell was he going to survive a year like this?
rockstarwarbler and tommyboykWhat: A face from the past
Where: Lima Bean, Lima
When: Monday morning after THIS
Blaine didn't know why he was torturing himself like this. It was his first trip to the Lima Bean since Kurt left for New York nearly a week ago, and it was the first time he had been here alone in a long, long time. He and Kurt always came together, and they had been coming here on dates together even before they were dating. They sat down, had coffee together, and just generally did boyfriendly things. Blaine had come thinking it might make him feel closer to Kurt and shed some of that ache he had in missing Kurt so fucking much, but it seemed to only be making him miss him more.
He sat at their favourite little table for two by the window alone, with his one lonely medium drip was sitting in front of him and not grande non-fat mocha cup to keep it company. just across the way, he could see the little old couple who had been here on so many their own dates many a time Kurt and Blaine had, they had practically double-dated all this time, even if they didn't even know each other. When Blaine teared up out of the blue and drew in a quick breath to try and keep his composure, hastily wiping at his eyes before he got himself into too much of a mess, he glanced over and saw the couple looking at him sadly, obviously assuming he and Kurt had broken up. Blaine forced a smile at them, but then picked up his coffee to busy himself with that and try to save face.
Shit, he missed Kurt. He missed him more than he could have anticipated. It was like a constantly aching hole inside, even if they did Skype every day. It just wasn't the same and it was only the start. Last night, though, Kurt had texted Blaine late afternoon while Blaine was still at work and told him he was pretty sure he just experienced his first questionable New York hot dog, and that he had an upset stomach, so he was going to lie down. Then he added a second message telling Blaine to meet him on Skype at the usual time, but if he wasn't there, he was probably sleeping because he was really tired. Kurt never made it and Blaine sat on Skype for an hour waiting for him, but couldn't begrudge Kurt the sleep he obviously needed.
He didn't want to be a clingy boyfriend, but it was early days and he was finding it tough. Tears blurred his vision again when he took his phone from his pocket and flicked Kurt a quick text that simply said 'I miss you. I love you ♥' How the hell was he going to survive a year like this?
rockstarwarbler.livejournal.comWho: rockstarwarbler and justbeingaqueen
What: No goodbyes
Where: Fort Wayne International Airport, Ohio
When: Wednesday, 27th June
Blaine knew this wasn't really a goodbye because Kurt promised he would never say goodbye to him. Blaine was holding onto that notion for dear life, but by god was he a mess as he stood at the departure gate with Kurt when they heard the boarding call for the flight he was getting to New York with, of all people, Santana. Santana had already said her goodbyes to Brittany before they got to the gate, but Blaine refused to leave until Kurt was on the plane and he had watched it take off. Over by the boarding gate, Santana was rolling her eyes impatiently while Blaine stood there in a snotty, teary mess trying to fumble some Kleenex out of his pocket.
He was going to be seeing Kurt again in just a few weeks time, but had scored a summer job at Between the Sheets, so he had to stay for now. But Kurt... this was him packed up and ready to leave Lima for good. He and Santana were going to find an apartment in the city. He wouldn't live in Lima again. It was this though that had a loud sob escaping Blaine and another flood of tears spilled down his cheeks. "You will call me as soon as you get there, right? And we can Skype tonight, right? Make sure you tell me as soon as you get there safely, okay? I-I love you. I love you so much," he said tearfully, wiping at his eyes as he clutched Kurt's hand tightly.
That was when he just scooped Kurt into a crushing hug like he never wanted to let go, and murmured into his ear, "Please, please don't forget me."
rockstarwarbler and justbeingaqueenWhat: No goodbyes
Where: Fort Wayne International Airport, Ohio
When: Wednesday, 27th June
Blaine knew this wasn't really a goodbye because Kurt promised he would never say goodbye to him. Blaine was holding onto that notion for dear life, but by god was he a mess as he stood at the departure gate with Kurt when they heard the boarding call for the flight he was getting to New York with, of all people, Santana. Santana had already said her goodbyes to Brittany before they got to the gate, but Blaine refused to leave until Kurt was on the plane and he had watched it take off. Over by the boarding gate, Santana was rolling her eyes impatiently while Blaine stood there in a snotty, teary mess trying to fumble some Kleenex out of his pocket.
He was going to be seeing Kurt again in just a few weeks time, but had scored a summer job at Between the Sheets, so he had to stay for now. But Kurt... this was him packed up and ready to leave Lima for good. He and Santana were going to find an apartment in the city. He wouldn't live in Lima again. It was this though that had a loud sob escaping Blaine and another flood of tears spilled down his cheeks. "You will call me as soon as you get there, right? And we can Skype tonight, right? Make sure you tell me as soon as you get there safely, okay? I-I love you. I love you so much," he said tearfully, wiping at his eyes as he clutched Kurt's hand tightly.
That was when he just scooped Kurt into a crushing hug like he never wanted to let go, and murmured into his ear, "Please, please don't forget me."
justbeingaqueen.livejournal.comWho: justbeingaqueen and have2justbeme
What: From one bitch to another
Where: McKinley High parking lot, Lima
When: Post Class of 2012 graduation ceremony
Linked from![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-community.gif)
musebysentence:
It had taken Santana a long time to get to this point, but there was a thrill of pride that went through her as she crossed the school parking lot at graduation, turned on her heel when she heard the word "dyke," and raised both middle fingers to Rick the Stick with a classy bitch attitude and a easily uttered, "Screw you."
justbeingaqueen and have2justbemeWhat: From one bitch to another
Where: McKinley High parking lot, Lima
When: Post Class of 2012 graduation ceremony
Linked from
musebysentence: It had taken Santana a long time to get to this point, but there was a thrill of pride that went through her as she crossed the school parking lot at graduation, turned on her heel when she heard the word "dyke," and raised both middle fingers to Rick the Stick with a classy bitch attitude and a easily uttered, "Screw you."
{{leavinglima}} glee rp // post season 3
Jun. 30th, 2012 11:29 pmjustbeingaqueen.livejournal.com
